Mad Ave Anonymous

Ad execs are a uniquely self-loathing set, and thanks to TheCreativeConfessional.com, they can now gripe without being named. Here’s one week’s sample of their darkest secrets

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The worst part about the Super Bowl is coming to work the next day and hearing the people who never produced anything good trash the ads

That super-expensive toothpaste we did a spot for — the one that protects enamel from acid?

A cheap glass of milk does the same thing

When my highest-paid computer graphics artist took her third “surprise pregnancy” extended maternity leave in four years, I stopped hiring any woman under 35

I’m skipping a big meeting to live-tweet the 30 Rock finale

I took home a magic mouse and sold it on EBay. Then I got a new one from IT and did it again

I turned down a job once because it seemed like I’d have to get there on time in the morning

If one more person mentions Don Draper in a meeting, I’m going to stab him in the throat

We’ve hired temps to sit in empty cubes whenever clients come in

I would never hire a fat person

I hide vintage pornography from the ’20s, ’30s, and ’40s deep within the layer groups of my Photoshop files

We were told to cut $400k from our budget ...

... and blew $200k just talking about it

I wear headphones all day long whether I am listening to music or not simply to dissuade people from asking me anything about anything

I convinced a junior account person that the more files you put on your laptop, the heavier it gets

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